Thought for week ending 15August 2025

 Proverbs 15:1

A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.

A short reading this week, only eleven words, but a lesson from the Old Testament that is equally if not more important today than it was when first written all those years ago.  It is a really important message, a message that if more people at all levels of society took onboard, there would be less conflict in our day to day lives and less conflict in the world in general.

When the bible reminds us about the way we should be behaving again and again, I guess it’s necessary because with time passing, maybe we revert wholly or partly back to our old ways and need to hear these words, these instructions, this God-given guidance again and again.

We all come across situations when we are angered or offended by what someone has said to us.   It’s part of human nature, it is unavoidable and can begin early.  I’m thinking of the time when a wee boy or girl tells you ‘I don’t want to play with you anymore’ or ‘I’m telling the teacher on you’.

During my working days, I used to get emails that really annoyed me and my initial reaction was to reply immediately with an equally if not more aggressive response.  One of my colleagues told me then to stop doing that.  He advised me to take time and think about my response, and I took his advice and arrived at the conclusion it was the right thing to do, and I still try to follow the same advice even although my working days are well behind me.

When you react to an aggressive or hurtful comment whether it comes face to face, in an email or in a letter with an equally aggressive or hurtful response, it solves nothing and more than likely, will result in an escalation of the problem.  The more a problem escalates, the harder it becomes to arrive at some form of resolution to that problem.  It can result in a relatively minor problem developing into something that becomes a major problem.

Another version of the guidance from today’s reading was given to me from another friend and he put it in this manner: ‘when someone says something to you that is upsetting, engage your brain before you engage your mouth’.  It can save relationships, reduce conflict and result in de-escalation rather than the alternative.

Wise words from men when they mirror the words of God without adding or taking away anything from them.

Prayer

Heavenly Father, we pray that we may take note of the godly and gracious way to speak to others and apply it in our lives. Help us to be careful when responding to the words of others so that we quell anger rather than allow it to develop.  Help us to turn away any bitterness or wrath with a soft and gentle answer.  Lord, prevent us from ever crushing the heart or soul of another, through careless speech.  Put the words in our mouths that will spread wisdom and knowledge, truth and love.  May our speech and language reflect the gracious words that fell from the lips of the Lord Jesus during his sojourn on earth, and may we only say and do those things that will be pleasing in his eyes and honour his name. In Jesus' name, Amen  (with thanks to knowing-jesus.com)